There was Kevin. He could make me laugh without even trying - that's the best kind of hysterical. And then there was Bradley. He went in and out of my life with intrigue; I don't think I ever fully knew who he was but that was part of the mystery - a girl loves a good contrivance. And David - a man who was going places with his strong jaw and stronger mind but I ruined that faster than you can say dating. Chris with the long hair but he has it short now. We hung with his iguana and then it was over. Anthony was my favorite in Miami. He loved the calves I hate so much and we played basketball in the short southern Florida rains. Brussels, Belgium is where I met Vincent. His English was worse than my French so we communicated in Frenglish and pantomime and coy smiles - his French mixtape comes out of the dust for that one song.
My best friend at Saratoga was named Stephanie. She sat on the counter like a frog and did her makeup in the mirror and her eyes were like a cat's but the bluest. In San Francisco, Liz and Sydney. They were beautiful dancers and took that beauty with them everywhere they went. In elementary school, Autumn and I were inseparable. We dressed up like Sailor Moon and sold lemonade on the street. Nikki came and went in one year but the puerility of our jokes is a reminder to never lose my youth.
My best friend at Saratoga was named Stephanie. She sat on the counter like a frog and did her makeup in the mirror and her eyes were like a cat's but the bluest. In San Francisco, Liz and Sydney. They were beautiful dancers and took that beauty with them everywhere they went. In elementary school, Autumn and I were inseparable. We dressed up like Sailor Moon and sold lemonade on the street. Nikki came and went in one year but the puerility of our jokes is a reminder to never lose my youth.
Everything is fleeting. People, like moments or objects, come into your life without intention and exit without avail. There are three types of people in the world. The ones you don't need and never will, the ones you need for a brief glimpse of time, and the ones you need forever and always regardless of how often you speak with them or see them - time is of no matter to these ones. It is up to us, as we are the creators of our fates, to distinguish the difference in necessity. Sometimes it is simple to eliminate a person from our lives, just as sometimes it is simple to definitively declare that a specific person should be in our lives. But most of the time, deciding is difficult. So we put that person on the back burner, awaiting a later decision. It is then that the person floats in or out, like water drifting between buoys. Only after that person has disappeared from your every day affairs that you realize how much he is needed, or realize that she has left tiny stamps on your soul, to influence and change your future to that tiniest degree.
I visited Sam this past week for a few days, and though we haven't seen each other in over a year, it was like we haven't skipped a beat. Or Sara, with whom I'll catch up every few months or so and divulge all of my secrets. Brooke and I were perpetually together for four years straight and her absence now is a reminder of the helplessly good times we shared and will continue to share. Maria, with her logical brain and quick puns, she keeps me sane and puts it all into perspective - we are in control of how we react. And the sisters I am gaining in my teammates. I cannot name them all here, such as I cannot name all the brightest stars in the sky.
How do we know when to let go and hold on? Some are good, but some are just that much better. And ultimately, the better will manifest in the best of myself.
How do we know when to let go and hold on? Some are good, but some are just that much better. And ultimately, the better will manifest in the best of myself.
No comments:
Post a Comment